Not that closet perverts. I'm coming out of the "My family has super-powers closet." I'm serious. My wife can eavesdrop on a conversation 3 tables away in a busy restaurant and know what the couple is arguing about. My oldest daughter can make any human, (usually me) wait in the car for 5-10 minutes every time we get ready to go someplace. My youngest daughter can fart at will. *Wipes tear from eye with pride. Even our dog has powers. She can piss on the carpet every single day. It's quite amazing.
What's you're superpower JJ?
I'm glad you asked. I have the uncanny ability to "read between the lines". What that means is I can tell what other people mean when they say something. For instance, when someone asks "How are you doing?". Most people hear "I'm doing fine."
Here's what I hear:
"How are you doing?"
"What do you care? I can totally tell by the look on your face you're only asking because you want something from me. Right? RIGHT?!"
It's a gift. But the reason I'm telling this story is because unlike my dog, I've decided to use my powers for good.
Which brings us to the first ever edition of Reading Between the Lines!
Ben Askren, when asked about his fighting style and perceived lack of putting on exciting fights:
“I feel that I’ve improved in every fight but I’m going to stick to my base and that’s wrestling."
What Ben means is: "If I can win by holding a guy down and occasionally patting his face with my glove or elbow, why would I stand and get punched in the face?"
Good point Ben.
Chris Weidman when asked what he thought of the Silva v. Bonnar fight:
"I was a little shocked and confused and a little disappointed."
What Chris was actually saying: "Are you fucking kidding me?"
I know Chris. I know.
And finally, Stephan Bonnar when asked for his thoughts on his upcoming fight with Anderson Silva: "I thought it was a joke (when I heard I was fighting Silva)."
Translated: "OMG! I'm gonna get my ass kicked!"
What's you're superpower JJ?
I'm glad you asked. I have the uncanny ability to "read between the lines". What that means is I can tell what other people mean when they say something. For instance, when someone asks "How are you doing?". Most people hear "I'm doing fine."
Here's what I hear:
"How are you doing?"
"What do you care? I can totally tell by the look on your face you're only asking because you want something from me. Right? RIGHT?!"
It's a gift. But the reason I'm telling this story is because unlike my dog, I've decided to use my powers for good.
Which brings us to the first ever edition of Reading Between the Lines!
Ben Askren, when asked about his fighting style and perceived lack of putting on exciting fights:
“I feel that I’ve improved in every fight but I’m going to stick to my base and that’s wrestling."
What Ben means is: "If I can win by holding a guy down and occasionally patting his face with my glove or elbow, why would I stand and get punched in the face?"
Good point Ben.
Chris Weidman when asked what he thought of the Silva v. Bonnar fight:
"I was a little shocked and confused and a little disappointed."
What Chris was actually saying: "Are you fucking kidding me?"
I know Chris. I know.
And finally, Stephan Bonnar when asked for his thoughts on his upcoming fight with Anderson Silva: "I thought it was a joke (when I heard I was fighting Silva)."
Translated: "OMG! I'm gonna get my ass kicked!"
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